(Faith and good character are the foundation of righteousness – Fulfilling duties and rights – Compatibility and suitability – Protective jealousy, overlooking faults, and safeguarding chastity).
The First Sermon
All praise is due to Allah, who established His religion and placed no crookedness in it, and made His Sharīʿah easy, placing in it neither restriction nor hardship. I bear witness that there is no deity worthy of worship except Allah alone, without partner, and I bear witness that Muḥammad is His servant and Messenger. May Allah send abundant peace and blessings upon him.
To proceed:
Fear Allah, servants of Allah, as He truly deserves to be feared, and remain mindful of Him in private and in secret.
يَاأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اتَّقُوا اللَّهَ حَقَّ تُقَاتِهِ وَلَا تَمُوتُنَّ إِلَّا وَأَنْتُمْ مُسْلِمُونَ
“O you who believe, fear Allah as He should truly be feared, and do not die except as Muslims.” [Sūrat Āl ʿImrān: 102].
Servant of Allah:
Fāṭimah bint Qays, may Allah be pleased with her, was among the earliest women who migrated. Her husband divorced her with a final, threefold divorce. She came to ask the Messenger of Allah ﷺ about a matter concerning her divorce, and he answered her. He then said to her: “When your waiting period has ended, inform me.”
Fāṭimah said: “Several men proposed to me, among them Muʿāwiyah and Abū al-Jahm.”
The Prophet ﷺ said: “Muʿāwiyah is poor and has little wealth, and Abū al-Jahm is harsh toward women—or he strikes women, or words to that effect—but you should marry Usāmah ibn Zayd.”
She said: “So I married him, and Allah honored me through Ibn Zayd and bestowed dignity upon me through Ibn Zayd.” [Narrated by Muslim].
And how could she not be honored through Usāmah ibn Zayd when he was the beloved son of the beloved?
The Prophet ﷺ would take him and al-Ḥasan and say: “O Allah, love them both, for indeed I love them both.” [Narrated by al-Bukhārī].
Servant of Allah:
Marriage is among the ways of the Messengers, and the Muslim household is the first building block of society. When it is sound, the Ummah is sound, and when it is corrupt, that is an ominous warning of its ruin.
Allah has legislated causes through which households may be sound and stable. The greatest of these is the righteousness of the spouses, especially the husband, whom Allah has made responsible for his wife and household.
So what are the qualities of a righteous husband? The first and greatest quality is faith in Allah. Allah has prohibited a Muslim woman from marrying a non-Muslim. He says:
يَاأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِذَا جَاءَكُمُ الْمُؤْمِنَاتُ مُهَاجِرَاتٍ فَامْتَحِنُوهُنَّ اللَّهُ أَعْلَمُ بِإِيمَانِهِنَّ فَإِنْ عَلِمْتُمُوهُنَّ مُؤْمِنَاتٍ فَلَا تَرْجِعُوهُنَّ إِلَى الْكُفَّارِ لَا هُنَّ حِلٌّ لَهُمْ وَلَا هُمْ يَحِلُّونَ لَهُنَّ
“O you who believe, when believing women come to you as emigrants, test them. Allah knows best about their faith. If you determine that they are believers, then do not return them to the disbelievers. They are not lawful for them, nor are they lawful for these women.” [Sūrat al-Mumtaḥanah: 10].
Faith in Allah and steadfastness upon obedience to Him are the foundation of righteousness, the lamp of light, and the life-giving rain.
What good can be hoped for from a wicked servant who has no religion to restrain him from violating the sacred limits of Allah? For this reason, Allah, Glorified, says:
وَأَنْكِحُوا الْأَيَامَى مِنْكُمْ وَالصَّالِحِينَ مِنْ عِبَادِكُمْ وَإِمَائِكُمْ إِنْ يَكُونُوا فُقَرَاءَ يُغْنِهِمُ اللَّهُ مِنْ فَضْلِهِ وَاللَّهُ وَاسِعٌ عَلِيمٌ
“Marry off the unmarried among you and the righteous among your male and female slaves. If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty. And Allah is All-Encompassing, All-Knowing.” [Sūrat al-Nūr: 32].
The Prophet ﷺ said: “Do not keep company except with a believer, and let no one eat your food except a person of piety.” [Narrated by Abū Dāwūd].
Steadfastness means adhering to obedience to Allah and the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ. The righteous husband is a man who fears his Lord and fears Him in the unseen. His religion restrains him from wickedness, immorality, and oppression. He stops at the limits set by Allah.
For this reason, ʿUmar ibn ʿAbd al-ʿAzīz, may Allah have mercy upon him, said: “The person of piety is restrained by a bridle; he cannot do everything he desires.”
As for the wicked man who abandons the prayer, commits evil deeds, and does not care whether his earnings are lawful or unlawful, and who is obscene and foul-mouthed, such a person is like a corrupt plant that produces nothing but bitter fruit.
For this reason, when a man asked al-Ḥasan al-Baṣrī, may Allah have mercy upon him: “I have a daughter whose hand has been sought in marriage. To whom should I marry her?”
He replied: “Marry her to someone who fears Allah. If he loves her, he will honor her, and if he dislikes her, he will not wrong her.” [Narrated by Ibn Abī al-Dunyā].
Yes, O father, the one who does not fear Allah cannot be trusted with your family’s honor. The one who betrays the first One who bestowed blessings upon him will not remain faithful to you.
For this reason, Imam al-Shaʿbī advised you, saying: “Whoever marries his daughter to a wicked man has severed his family ties.” [Narrated by Ibn Abī Shaybah].
Furthermore, part of righteousness is that the husband follows the Sunnah and is not among the people of religious innovation and misguidance.
Trials snatch people away and hearts are weak. For this reason, al-Fuḍayl ibn ʿIyāḍ, may Allah have mercy upon him, said: “Whoever marries his precious daughter to an innovator has severed her family ties.” [Narrated by al-Lālakāʾī].
Among the most important qualities of a righteous husband is good character. The Prophet ﷺ said: “If someone whose religion and character you are pleased with proposes to you, then marry him. If you do not do so, there will be tribulation upon the earth and widespread corruption.” [Narrated by al-Tirmidhī].
The righteous husband is truthful and does not lie, trustworthy and does not betray, faithful and does not act treacherously, generous and not miserly, just and not oppressive, chaste and not obscene, humble and not arrogant, forbearing and not hasty, firm and does not tolerate transgression, patient in times of hardship, merciful, gentle, easy-going, and mild.
The Prophet ﷺ said: “The people of Paradise are three: a ruler who is just, charitable, and guided to success; a man who is merciful and tender-hearted toward every relative and Muslim; and a chaste man who refrains from asking despite having dependents.” [Narrated by Muslim].
The Prophet ﷺ also said: “Indeed, those who act justly will be upon pulpits of light with Allah, on the right of al-Raḥmān, Mighty and Majestic—and both of His hands are right hands—those who are just in their judgments, with their families, and in whatever they are entrusted with.” [Narrated by Muslim].
The righteous husband does not neglect what Allah has obligated upon him regarding care for his wife and children, by setting right their religious and worldly affairs.
He establishes the religion of Allah among them as much as he is able, through teaching, guidance, advice, and planting faith within them. He also spends upon them in a reasonable manner, without extravagance or stinginess. Allah, Exalted, says:
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَى بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنْفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ
“Men are caretakers and maintainers of women because Allah has given some of them an advantage over others and because they spend from their wealth.” [Sūrat al-Nisāʾ: 34].
A man asked the Messenger of Allah ﷺ: “What right does the wife of one of us have over him?”
He replied: “That you feed her when you eat, clothe her when you clothe yourself or acquire clothing, do not strike the face, do not insult her, and do not forsake her except within the home.” [Narrated by Abū Dāwūd].
The righteous husband protects his family from harm, carries the burdens of life on their behalf, and does not expose them to unnecessary mixing with men.
This is the Prophet of Allah Mūsā (may peace be upon him), concerning whom Allah says:
إِذْ قَالَ مُوسَى لِأَهْلِهِ إِنِّي آنَسْتُ نَارًا سَآتِيكُمْ مِنْهَا بِخَبَرٍ أَوْ آتِيكُمْ بِشِهَابٍ قَبَسٍ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَصْطَلُونَ
“When Mūsā said to his family, ‘Indeed, I have seen a fire. I will bring you news from it, or I will bring you a burning ember so that you may warm yourselves.’” [Sūrat al-Naml: 7].
The righteous husband is one who is suitable and compatible with his wife. The foremost aspect of suitability is religion, followed by acceptance and compatibility. The Prophet ﷺ said: “Choose carefully for your offspring, marry those who are suitable, and marry your women to them.” [Narrated by Ibn Mājah].
Among compatibility is suitability in age. Fāṭimah, the daughter of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, was proposed to by Abū Bakr and ʿUmar, may Allah be pleased with them both.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “She is young.” Then ʿAlī proposed to her, and he married her to him. [Narrated by al-Nasāʾī].
Among compatibility is mutual acceptance and happiness. The Prophet ﷺ said: “Souls are like assembled troops. Those among them that recognize one another are drawn together, and those that are unfamiliar with one another differ.” [Narrated by al-Bukhārī and Muslim].
ʿUrwah ibn al-Zubayr, may Allah have mercy upon him, related from ʿUmar ibn al-Khaṭṭāb, may Allah be pleased with him, that he said: “No one should force his daughter to marry an unattractive man, for women love what you love.” [Narrated by Saʿīd ibn Manṣūr].
The righteous husband is the one who acts upon the advice of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, who said: “Treat women well, for the woman was created from a rib, and the most curved part of the rib is its uppermost part. If you try to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, it will remain curved. So treat women well.” [Narrated by al-Bukhārī and Muslim].
The righteous husband knows that there is weakness and crookedness in a woman that is appropriate to her nature and responsibilities, so he does not treat her as he would a man.
Rather, as the Prophet ﷺ said: “A believing man should not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one characteristic in her, he will be pleased with another.” [Narrated by Muslim].
The righteous husband overlooks faults and does not scrutinize everything. He manages matters wisely without compromising principles. Allah related concerning our Prophet ﷺ:
وَإِذْ أَسَرَّ النَّبِيُّ إِلَى بَعْضِ أَزْوَاجِهِ حَدِيثًا فَلَمَّا نَبَّأَتْ بِهِ وَأَظْهَرَهُ اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ عَرَّفَ بَعْضَهُ وَأَعْرَضَ عَنْ بَعْضٍ
“When the Prophet confided a matter to one of his wives, and when she disclosed it and Allah made it known to him, he made known part of it and overlooked part.” [Sūrat al-Taḥrīm: 3].
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “Indeed, the woman was created from a rib. If you try to straighten her completely, you will break her. So deal with her gently, and you will live happily with her.” [Narrated by Ibn Ḥibbān].
May Allah have mercy upon Imam Aḥmad ibn Ḥanbal, who said: “Well-being consists of ten parts, all of which are found in overlooking faults.” [Narrated by al-Bayhaqī].
The righteous husband is a man who possesses the qualities of manhood. He has protective jealousy over his honor, but without suspicion. He does not search for people’s hidden faults, nor does he tolerate shameful conduct.
The Prophet ﷺ said: “There is a type of protective jealousy that Allah loves and a type that Allah hates. As for the protective jealousy that Allah loves, it is jealousy when there is genuine cause for suspicion. As for the protective jealousy that Allah hates, it is jealousy where there is no cause for suspicion.” [Narrated by Abū Dāwūd].
The Prophet ﷺ also said: “If you search for people’s hidden faults, you will corrupt them, or almost corrupt them.” [Narrated by Abū Dāwūd].
May Allah bless me and you through the Magnificent Qurʾān and benefit me and you through its verses and wise reminder.
I seek Allah’s forgiveness for myself and for you, so seek His forgiveness. Indeed, He is the All-Forgiving, the Most Merciful.
The Second Sermon
All praise is due to Allah. May peace and blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah, his family, his Companions, and all those who follow him.
To proceed:
The righteous husband safeguards his wife’s chastity, for this is among the greatest purposes of marriage.
The Prophet ﷺ reproached ʿAbd Allāh ibn ʿAmr ibn al-ʿĀṣ, may Allah be pleased with them both, for becoming preoccupied with excessive worship at the expense of his family, saying: “Indeed, your body has a right over you, your eyes have a right over you, and your wife has a right over you.” [Narrated by al-Bukhārī and Muslim].
It is especially fitting for the righteous husband in this age, in which temptations have become widespread, to do that which satisfies the eyes and heart of his wife.
He should keep himself clean and adorn himself. He should not constantly criticize what she does, her food, or her words. Rather, he should praise and compliment her, nurture love within her, and surround her with mercy.
May Allah be pleased with ʿAbd Allāh ibn ʿAbbās, who said: “I like to adorn myself for my wife just as I like for my wife to adorn herself for me, because Allah, Exalted, says:
ولهن مثل الذي عليهن بالمعروف
‘And women have rights similar to the obligations upon them, according to what is reasonable.’ [Sūrat al-Baqarah: 228], Narrated by Ibn Abī Shaybah [23].
Men, here is the comprehensive advice of the Prophet ﷺ: “The best of you are those who are best to their families, and I am the best of you to my family.” [Narrated by al-Tirmidhī].
O Allah, help us and do not help against us. Support us and do not support others against us. Plan in our favor and do not plan against us. Grant us victory over those who transgress against us.
O Allah, grant us security in our homelands, rectify our leaders and those entrusted with our affairs, and place authority over us in the hands of those who fear You, are mindful of You, and follow what pleases You.
O Allah, support our oppressed brothers in Gaza and everywhere else, and decree for them victory and relief soon.
Servants of Allah: Remember Allah abundantly and glorify Him morning and evening. And the conclusion of our supplication is: all praise belongs to Allah, Lord of all worlds.
